After New Year’s Day, the holiday season is officially over. We now have to wait for the Martin Luther King holiday, and then Groundhog Day. I’d probably be a lot more excited about those days if there was a corresponding horror movie associated with them. After all, New Years Eve and Day, Christmas, and obviously Halloween all have horror films associated with them. You can also add President’s Day (The Tripper), St. Patrick’s Day (The Leprechaun), Thanksgiving (Thankskilling), and even April Fool’s Day (self-titled). Which horror movies need to be made about the lesser holidays?
Potential plot: Having moved to a completely paperless ballot system, voting machines become an integral part of the voting system… until they become self aware, elect a robot President, and take over the country.
Cinco de Mayo
Potential plot: A tequila factory haunted by the ghosts of Mexican soldiers begins cranking out bottles with evil worms, who avenge their deaths by murdering the people who consume them on Cinco de Mayo.
Potential plot: It’s all inebriation, debauchery, and revelry in New Orleans until partiers begin showing up turned to stone. I think you see where this is going: Gorgon breasts.
Potential plot: Zombie I.R.S. agents arise from their graves and eat the brains of fraudulent taxpayers. The only way to defeat them is to shoot them in their pocket protectors. Stars Bruce Campbell.
Potential plot: An under-the-gun executive finally snaps from the pressure after receiving one “World’s Greatest Boss” mug too many and goes on a serial killing rampage through all of his stomping grounds. The country club scene is the most brutal. Stars David Hyde Pierce.
Potential plot: While on an anthropological dig in Cuba, a vengeful Italian spirit is unearthed, punishing anyone who claims that the world is round.
Potential plot: An unemployed father obsessed with doing more for his children becomes obsessed with the likes of Heathcliffe Huxtable, Ward Cleaver, and whatever those guys’ names were in My Two Dads. Any perceived threat to the perfect fatherly world that he’s created is met with violence and dismemberment. It’s a lot like Adam Sandler’s Big Daddy gone horribly wrong. Patton Oswalt takes the lead role of the father.
Potential plot: Sort of like Groundhog Day starring Bill Murray… if Murray was an alcoholic who committed involuntary manslaughter in a bar fight every day, with each day repeating itself. Possible title: Deathlight Savings.
If you enjoyed this article, you may also enjoy:
Film Interpretations of Various Artists
Aliens Throughout History
Through a Synthesizer Darkly: Lebowski Scenes Using Voice Synthesizers